Submission isn’t Silent

The Submissive Wife—and Finding Your Voice

Guest Post: Janel Breitenstein is a married mother of 4 who writes frequently for FamilyLife. Janel and her husband John currently serve with eMi in Uganda. Additionally, Janel’s husband serves on the Board of Marriage Revolution. You can visit her blog at

Submission is not silent

A friend and I were out for a rare breakfast, our hands curled around ceramic mugs of decaf. “What’s the best way to pray for you and your husband?” I’d asked quietly. But it was her answer that surprised me—and the liquid I saw collecting around the rims of her eyes.

“Pray for me”—she paused here—“to find my voice.”

Marriage Must Reads

Catching Foxes” by John Henderson

We must prepare for marriage well – a preparation not of guest lists and wedding attire, but of our souls. Our hearts must be awakened, matured, and strengthened in Jesus Christ. We must learn to appreciate the covenant of marriage. We must learn to wear Jesus Christ. Our hearts must be focused on Him. We must be filled with His grace and learning to follow His words. This book aims to help us accomplish this kind of preparation for marriage.

Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy” by Gary Thomas

Your marriage is more than a sacred covenant with another person. It is a spiritual discipline designed to help you know God better, trust him more fully, and love him more deeply. Scores of books have been written that offer guidance for building the marriage of your dreams. But what if God’s primary intent for your marriage isn’t to make you happy. . . but holy? And what if your relationship isn’t as much about you and your spouse as it is about you and God?

Thriving Despite A Difficult Marriage” by Michael and Chuck Misja

It’s a hard reality for some: Marriage is difficult, disappointing, and painful. Your spouse is unwilling to change. How do you continue, and not just exist but thrive? God can help you move beyond suffering and mere surviving to finding joy and supernatural thriving.